nut hugger
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize
