Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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