We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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