I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
