i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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