i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
