wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
organizing the empties. That sober.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
