I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
What a dumb baby whore.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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