i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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