Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
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