You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Sober January is a disaster.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
