i think my tv is drunk
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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