**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
my vag is so smooth its legendary
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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