Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
