Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
