As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize