She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
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