Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
