Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
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