You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
