omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
