He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Is it penis luge time yet?
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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