That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Sext me about skeletons
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
