well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
