guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
