Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
