No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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