quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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