Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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