Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
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