Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
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