I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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