Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
