I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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