I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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