if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
