Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
