It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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