I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
