i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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