His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
