the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
