I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
