My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize