If that was your dad, he is hot
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
sick fucks of a feather flock together
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
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