fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
She told me I should be a condom model.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
