We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
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