you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
