Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize
