My friends, they love my intelligence
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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