i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
My vagina just clenched in fear
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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